Mere Infatuation
... feelings of panic, uncertainty, overpowering lust, feverish excitement, impatience, and/or jealously.
... thrilled, but not happy, wanting to trust, yet suspicious.
I'm miserable when you' re away, almost like I'm not complete unless I'm with you. It’s a rush and it’s intense. It’s difficult to concentrate.
Do any of these “symptoms” resemble feelings of love? Or mere infatuation? Where does it come from? Perhaps it’s biological?
"You don't love me like I love you"
Problems creeped in when I started to have thoughts of “do I love him more than he loves me?” I started examining all the things I do for him. All the ways we express our love and how much time and energy we’re putting into the relationship. Then I tried to figure out if he was giving an equal amount back.
If I perceive the discrepancy in that balance sheet, naturally I will start backing away from the relationship. Does loving someone feel good regardless if it’s returned? I have don’t want to get caught up in “if they loved me, they’d know”, cause they don’t.
"We can't talk about that."
Every time I approach certain subjects, it turns into an argument. In the back of my mind, I opt to avoid that topic in the future because I don't want to fight. I believe fighting means the relationship is on rocky ground or is threatening to the relationship. That list of "don't touch that one" makes me feel distant and detached. I start wondering how much longer I can live like this.
When we are fearful, angry, anxious, unhappy, or jealous, are we truly experiencing a state of love?
--- o ---
If you go into a relationship not feeling terribly good about yourself,
you're more likely to become dependent on your partner to help you feel good
about yourself. If we felt empty before they appeared in our lives, we
fear the emptiness returning if they leave, so their staying with us becomes
paramount. That dependency can create all kinds of fear and unhappiness when
there's a perceived threat to you staying together.
you're more likely to become dependent on your partner to help you feel good
about yourself. If we felt empty before they appeared in our lives, we
fear the emptiness returning if they leave, so their staying with us becomes
paramount. That dependency can create all kinds of fear and unhappiness when
there's a perceived threat to you staying together.
If we aren’t giving ourselves the acceptance we crave, we look to those around us to provide it for us. Again, none of this has a thing to do with the love you feel, but everything to do with the fear you feel.If you really want to remove the love baggage of fear and unhappiness, the first step is to improve your self awareness and self acceptance.
posted by Michelle at 5:49 PM
1 Comments:
yesterday i happen to watch oprah. she was talking about how often women would dedicate their entire lives to please their husbands/partners/lovers. they are at a loosing end because each time, women loose themselves until nothing is left. her wants. her dreams. her being. its all going to be about what He needs, what He wants ... this is just sad if you ask me.
remember we were talking about how defeated women are about getting orgasms during sex and that its "just the ways things are" attitude. it isnt supposed to be like that. women should be able to enjoy sex as much as men can. if i were a woman. i would demand it. a real man wouldnt ask for anything less. you dont like being lied to. men dont like being lied to as well. try it. men appreciate honesty just as anybody.
finalement, i thought if i am going to give myself up for someone. id rather give it to someone who really deserves me. not because i dont want to be alone.
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